My husband is always content. No matter what the circumstances, his job, money, life in general, good or bad, he's content. He accepts what is going on around him, embraces it, and keeps living in that moment.
Not me.
When things are bad, there is a meltdown and when things are good I think about other things that would be even better. I'm never in the moment. I am restless right now with the changing of seasons and the completion of projects. With very few new projects on the horizon and the holidays still so far away, I feel like I need a therapist due to my lack of direction. This is when I start getting antsy to travel, to paint, to visit art museums on rainy days and to write. I am more than an artist, wife or mom. I am a perpetual student of history and art. I am a wanderer.
I long to stand in awe of the beauty in this world.
As the fall creeps in I'm sure my restlessness will fade to excitement for the season. For anniversaries, for pumpkins, for fall leaves, for Picasso exhibits, for twinkle lights, for our first Christmas tree, and seeing Avery's face on Christmas morning. For the new year, the Trailblazers, for snow, my 30th birthday and for our upcoming vacation.
For now, however, I am restless.